*Whispers* I’m not referring to the cliché ‘....did the earth move for you, -and the stars and the moon…” OR, the “Wow! How was that for you honey?”
You see, -I was quite happily reading a novel recently, and all seemed to be going exceedingly well, –until that scene. Post-coital, when the recently bedded MC decides to psycho-analyse her hotly sought after Man about his ex-girlfriends marriage. For the purposes of my post, I shall embellish a little but the dialogue went a little like this:
Satiated-Alpha-Hunky-Gent lies back in bed, pulling his lady into his arms: “Oh baby, you are the best!”
Freshly-Ravished-Lady, breathless: “Was that Lara? I saw you talking to earlier...”
Satiated-but-now-slightly-perplexed-Gent shifts uncomfortably: “Um, yeah, she’s having a few problems...”
Ravished Lady wearing furrowed brow sits upright, holding psychology manual: “Has she considered talking to someone professional about it...”
Me: Say what? How did they go from hot love-making to psycho analysis on said Hunks ex-girlfriend?
It seemed to jar the whole scene –I know conflict is required but seriously, can we pick the right moment? Call me old fashioned, but there’s bedroom conversation etiquette, -Politics, Religion, and Psycho Ex’s must be keep out of it at all costs. Ahem, of course you can keep the hot sex scene in there…it’s the bedroom scene for crying out loud! Sometimes it really might be best to draw the curtains, leave the two MCs alone to their sunset and fade to black.
Have you found any 'Jarring' dialogue in any books recently?